Today being a writer is not such a good idea..

Today I want to crawl under my doona and hide there for a while. Today being a writer is not such a good idea. It does not make me burst into Katrinia and The Waves’s “I’m walking on sunshine” nor does it make me grin widely, fangs on show. I hunch over my computer and type. Who for? Me? Because my tutor told me to?

Probably the later, but also because I feel so guilty. There’s this creative beast in me. We’re sometimes friends. I feed it books and bits of marvellous things people say and sometimes I feel wonderful because we get one another. But sometimes I kind of hate that beast, that voice. I want to smother it under a pillow or do an Edgar Allan Poe and build a brick wall around it with no way out.. That way I can go out, click-clack my heels in the night forever and forget that allusive ambition of writing.

The beast makes me work. Won’t let me rest because there’s a thousand and one things that we can do together. But if I write it is quiet, satisfied as if is nodding – at least you’re trying and that’s a start.

And now for something completely different!

 

 

 

Advertisements

4 Comments

Filed under writing

4 responses to “Today being a writer is not such a good idea..

  1. GailWrites

    Yes, guilt when you veer off track from writing and uninspired when trying to exercise some discipline. I can relate.

    • Shannon McKeogh

      I think guilt actually helps me. Its just about sitting down and slugging through the pain. If I’m feeling too happy and contented I won’t write, I think there needs to be an aspect of anxiety/guilt to see the importance of getting your creative stuff done. If that makes sense?

  2. strangenewfriend

    Mines not a beast at all. It’s more like a mouse, and when I make it come out, it loses all its potential and only wants cheese.
    So I have to kind of trick it out, with inspirational things. But it has to be spontaneous, so it sometimes happens in the middle of a documentary, or during the sports reports on the news…
    And then it transforms into a mouse with its tongue hanging out cos its concentrating so hard on typing.
    The rest of the time its locked away in a cupboard next to a jar of cookies that I’m told I have to leave alone.

  3. Pingback: Building up writing muscles. Yeah, I work out. | Freedom Tights!

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s