“REALLY? Really?!” words uttered by house-mate during the show.
Thirty seconds in I immediately regretted my decision to watch Being Lara Bingle. Damn you Kirsten Innes, and your inspiring words to encourage me to write outside my crampy writing sphere. Look, where you’ve led me. 8.10pm on a Tuesday night watching a really tan, blonde chick say ‘like’ a lot.
For non-Aussie readers, Lara Bingle is a little bit like the Aussie version of Kim Kardash-face, but you can see the pores on her face and she’s got more of a goofy attitude. She became famous for wearing a bikini in an Australian tourism ad and then moving on to be involved in sex scandals with sports players. So, you know – just the usual celeb stuff.
This show made my body react in strange ways, my eyes started twitching when the characters were introduced in shiny colourful montages:
Lara Bingle: The model! Playful, fun and doesn’t care about the consequences.
Josh: The brother! Apparently has no other role except be a funny dorky bro.
Sharon: The mother! Gunna give Lara some hard love.
Hermonine: The friend/manager! (mind drifts off to harry potter)
This is the world that revolves around Lara Bingle, a fish-eyed, glamorous Bondi life. In the first episode Lara, Josh and Hermonine move in together – wow, that’s a convienieant plot to start with! Yes, it is a produced show but the dialogue is so stilted and bland it seems realistic.
Lara: “I am just, like, so happy.”
But reality is, uh, boring. Relief came in the two minute ad breaks which had more plot and substance than the actual show. Just so you know, I’m not being bitchy to Lara Bingle, because I don’t agree with people taking cheap shots at her which really is just plain old bullying.
But as TV writer Siobhian Duck said about the show – which is an obvious attempt to control the media’s portrayal of Lara – “[it] won’t change people’s opinion of her. It certainly didn’t alter mine.”
The show’s plot continued to be a groan-fest and many more “aww really!” moments. Lara gets pulled over by the police and gets in trouble for driving without a valid license, the paparazzi (“pap”) cause a bit of a scene, big nude photo scandal released in media dadada, publicist, fashion-stuff, etc. Really, Being Lara Bingle is a television form of a chick lit book. It’s got all the components: fame, a single protagonist looking for love working in a glitzy career. What its missing is some narrative arch and drama. Some action!
As Lara says in a philosophical moment the end of the show, “its your life, its real.” I’m not sure what that means exactly but I am sure they are very wise words.